What's in you Purse??

I have always been told, the contents of your purse says who you are in a nut shell. My mother also says that the size of your purse is the same size as your ass. Thanks mom. So my butt is huge, which it actually is, and has some relevant truth in it. I look around and I see some of that is true. Others must be, according to my mother's notion, wanting their butt to be small, because the purses they are carrying could only fit half a butt cheek.

My boyfriend says that my purse is a cruise ship, and well, I am okay with that. I can do things with my purse he would only dream of doing. Take for instance a movie. He cant stuff a meal and a drink from a fast food restaurant and or candy. I can put all of that in there and slide right past the ticket lady. She isn't dumb though. I know she probably does the same thing. But her butt isn't that big so maybe she has a little bit more trouble, if she is living by my mother's law.

The only downside of having a huge purse is its a dark hole. I can not find anything, and will sit there trying to find my keys, wallet, or phone. I giggled when I saw people trying to find their phone while it is ringing in their purse as a teen, thinking what a funny sight. Now I am that person trying to just find my sanity, realizing that my phone is actually in my back pocket.

So what is in my purse that would describe me in whole? I can only let you decipher, but maybe I can put a stab at it:

1) Phone- essential. Nobody these days goes without their phone
2) Wallet- jammed pack of course, as you would say a 'mama' wallet
3) Keys- if I can ever find them
4) Makeup Bag- I bring this everywhere, mostly because I work overnight and well overnights make you look like your 50 by morning or get the comment 'you look tired' so I try to help that from happening that often.
5) Tampons- Mother nature always freaking jumps out to scare me at all the wrong times
6) Gum- After a kid told me (working overnight) that my breath stunk, I thought no wonder no one stand right close to me ;)
7) Receipts- I know I should maybe organize or throw them out, but once they start coming out the top that is when I realize I should probably do it sooner then later.
8) Trash- Gum wrappers, bits of paper, ect. I know I know, probably not sanitary, but come on, its a black hole and honestly dont find anything until I try and clean it.

So there is kinda of the jist of what is in my purse. Be a psychologist all you want. Analayze me all you need to. I already know my butt is huge, my purse is the size of a cruise ship. But its a dandy purse, its gets me where I need to go, and its fashionable, like me, so mother there ya go, my big booty in a nut shell!!